Atomic Habits — Part 3

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Transcript

0:00Hi everyone, this is Read with Selina.
0:02Today we're on the third chapter of Atomic Habits
0:08Some people might think that they
0:09don't have any habits and they're
0:11doing just fine, but in reality,
0:13you already have a lot of
0:14habits even without realizing them.
0:17When you feel hungry, you
0:18will look for food.
0:19When you feel cold, you want
0:21to put on more clothes.
0:22When you feel bored, you
0:23may reach out for your
0:24phone and check social media.
0:26And most of the time, you engage
0:27in those actions even without conscious realization.
0:30Habits are reliable solutions to
0:32recurring problems in our environment.
0:34We need habits in order to
0:35function because our conscious mind is
0:38very limited, and it cannot multitask.
0:40It can only handle a couple
0:42of things at a time.
0:43Whereas our unconscious mind has this huge
0:46capacity, it has tons of latent knowledge
0:49that you can pull into your conscious
0:51mind, but you can't activate all of
0:52them at the same time.
0:53It's like a repository of
0:55learned behaviors and patterns.
0:57This is where habits reside.
0:58Most of the actions that we carry
1:00out in our daily lives are unconscious.
1:02Let's say that you are walking
1:04home, and your friend suddenly called
1:06you about this fascinating news that
1:08you're super excited to hear about.
1:10Without consciously thinking,
1:11you walk past alleyways,
1:13you cross streets, you go into your
1:15unit and you open your door...
1:17Before you know it, you're already sitting
1:20comfortably in your own chair at home.
1:22All these motions are carried out in autopilot
1:24without you consciously thinking about them,
1:27because you have repeated them so many
1:28times that it doesn't require your conscious
1:31attention to perform those tasks.
1:33Indeed, whenever your brain acquires something
1:35new, the conscious mind has this inclination or
1:39tendency to offload things that it has
1:42learned into the unconscious mind so that
1:44you can free up your mental capacity
1:46to think about something new.
1:47Despite that habits are essential and everyone
1:50has them, some people are still skeptical
1:52of them, thinking that if they form habits,
1:55maybe they will lose their freedom
1:57to a certain extent.
1:58They imagine that habits will make
2:00them into these robotic, monotonous people
2:03that can only follow past patterns.
2:05They're unable to think.
2:06These people tend to think
2:07that you have to choose
2:09only one between the two:
2:11either habits or freedom, but never both.
2:13This is a false dichotomy.
2:15What habits do is simply take care
2:18of the basics, things that you've already
2:19figured out, so that you can have
2:21mental capacity to think about something new.
2:23It frees up your mind
2:25instead of limits it.
2:26And those people that have no good
2:28habits to rely on tend to live
2:29in a mess, because their conscious mind
2:32does not have enough capacity to deal
2:34with everything that's thrown at them.
2:36And they're left with very little mental
2:38space for them to take control of their life,
2:40leaving alone doing something creative.
2:42Building habits in the present allows
2:43you to do more of what
2:45you want in the future.
2:45And I'm going to walk you through
2:47four laws that can help you build
2:49good habits and break bad ones.
2:51If you wanna develop a good habit,
2:53make it obvious, attractive, satisfying, and easy.
2:56If you wanna break a bad habit,
2:58make it invisible, unattractive, difficult,
3:01and unsatisfying.
3:03These four laws each correspond to
3:05one phase in the habit loop.
3:07This is what James Clear
3:08calls the "habit loop."
3:09If you're familiar with psychology, you might
3:11recognize this framework to be very similar
3:14to BF Skinner's behavioral psychology theories.
3:16Here, cue basically means any information
3:19in the environment that you notice
3:21that is significant to you;
3:23anything could potentially be a cue.
3:25Cues are objective, but interpretation
3:28of cues is subjective.
3:29For example, if a smoker sees
3:31a cigarette, that might trigger them
3:33to have an intense wave of
3:35desire to smoke it.
3:36On the other hand, non-smokers that
3:38see the same cigarette may not
3:39feel anything at all, or they
3:41may even feel a strong wave
3:43of repulsion upon seeing the cigarette.
3:44By adding feelings, emotions, meanings to the
3:48cues that we notice, cues become cravings.
3:51Craving is the desire to obtain something.
3:53For example, if I encounter a
3:55difficult problem at work, I may
3:57feel stumped and would want to
3:59relieve the frustration somewhere.
4:01And I would have an
4:01impulse to pick up my
4:02phone and check social media.
4:04The craving is not for
4:05social media per se, but
4:07for the relief of frustration.
4:09And with that desire to relieve
4:10my frustration, I may pick up
4:12my phone, which is the response.
4:14It is the actual doing of something.
4:16It's the behavior.
4:17Depending on how much friction there is
4:19to engaging the behavior, I may or
4:21may not have the response.
4:23For example, if I left my
4:24phone at home and didn't bring
4:26it to my office today, then
4:28it might be very challenging for
4:29me to actually check it.
4:30Whether I end up checking my phone
4:32will depend on how large the friction
4:34is relative to the motivation.
4:35For example, if I need to check
4:37my phone because my work requires it,
4:39even though the friction is high, and
4:41I have to go all the way
4:42home to retrieve it,
4:43I will still do it because the motivation to check
4:46my phone would exceed the friction of
4:48getting it.
4:49So after you engage the action,
4:51you would get a reward.
4:52Whether something is a reward depends
4:54on how much you like it.
4:55For example, imagine a hot summer's
4:57day, and you're extremely thirsty.
4:59All of a sudden you found
5:01this delicious bottle of water and
5:03you took a first sip.
5:04It's the "ahh" feeling that you
5:06get for satiating your desires.
5:08There's two functions, according to James
5:10Clear, that reward satisfies.
5:12If the reward is good and
5:13you like it, then it satisfies
5:15the craving, the desire for something.
5:18Also, the reward closes the loop
5:20because now that you know that this thing
5:22provides you with a reward,
5:24your brain learns, and next time you will know
5:26to look for it.
5:27For example, if you walk into
5:28a new restaurant that I've never
5:30been to before, and you order
5:31a dish that you've never had.
5:33You give it a try
5:34and you're pleasantly surprised.
5:35It turns out to be really good.
5:37Next time when you walk by
5:38the same restaurant, the restaurant will
5:40serve as a cue to remind
5:42you, "oh last time I got
5:43this really good dish, this time
5:45probably I should get it too."
5:46So here, you have the cue (you see the restaurant),
5:49get a craving for
5:50the dish that you had last time
5:51and you will order it.
5:52If it turns out to be really
5:54good, you would tend to repeat the
5:55process over and over again until at
5:58some point, one of the steps breaks.
6:00For example, this time the dish tastes really
6:02bad, and you are informed that
6:05they changed the chef or they
6:06used different ingredient.
6:07You don't like the new taste.
6:08Then the reward decreases.
6:10Now you like it less.
6:12This will break the loop.
6:14And over time you will unlearn the
6:16behavior of ordering the same dish.
6:18With this knowledge, we can make
6:19certain behaviors more frequent or even
6:22turn them into habits, automatic behaviors
6:24by doing the following.
6:26By strengthening each of the 4 steps,
6:28by making the cue more
6:29obvious, by making the craving more
6:31attractive, making the response more easy,
6:34and making the reward more satisfying.
6:37The reverse is true.
6:38If you want to make a behavior
6:39less frequent or even to stop it altogether,
6:42you can make the cue more invisible,
6:44craving more unattractive, response more difficult,
6:48and the reward more unsatisfying.
6:51These are the 4
6:52laws of behavioral change.
6:53Why does it matter?
6:54Sometimes we have this experience where we
6:56feel like we really want something,
6:58for example, work out, or read more, or
7:01call your family more frequently.
7:03But for some reason, we
7:04never end up doing that.
7:06Or sometimes we want to stop doing
7:08certain things like spending too much time
7:09on social media, drinking too much, smoking.
7:12But it seems to be extremely hard
7:13to break away from those behaviors.
7:15And we ask ourselves: why is
7:17it that I can't do what
7:18I say I would do?
7:20This is where this framework
7:21comes in handy, because it
7:23is based in human nature.
7:24And in order to have behavioral changes,
7:27it is important to have a system
7:29that can help you succeed.
7:30We do not rise to the height of our goals,
7:32we fall to the level of our system.
7:34In order to sustain any
7:36kind of behavior, we need
7:37to have a solid system.
7:39We have to maneuver our environment
7:41in a way that is conducive
7:42to the type of behavior that
7:43we will want to have.
7:44We're going to walk through each of
7:46those elements in more detail in the future
7:49and explain how you can apply
7:51this to your life.
7:52If there's anything you want to change
7:53in your life, but somehow you don't
7:55seem to be able to do so,
7:57this framework provides you the tools
7:59to build a system that would allow
8:01good habits to form and bad habits to
8:04go away.
8:04I'm going to share a lot more
8:06examples and tools in the upcoming episodes.
8:08So stay tuned, subscribe, like,
8:10and make a comment below.
8:12I'll see you again next time.

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